Thursday, 10 October 2013

Murray Walkerisms...

Classics from the doyen of motor sports commentators:

"Unless I am very much mistaken.... I AM very much mistaken!"

"Mansell is slowing down, taking it easy. Oh no he isn't IT'S A LAP RECORD."

"This is an interesting circuit, because it has inclines. And not just up, but down as well."

"The lead car is absolutely unique, except for the one behind it which is identical."

"The most important part of the car is the nut that holds the wheel."

"I know it's an old cliche, but you can cut the atmosphere with a cricket stump."

"Tambay's hopes, which were nil before, are absolutely zero now."

"And there's no damage to the car. Except to the car itself."

"That's the first time he had started from the front row in a Grand Prix, having done so in Canada earlier this year."

"Here in Malaysia, it doesn't rain here by the bucketful, it rains by the ocean."

"How you can crash into a wall without it being there in the first place is beyond me!"

"Excuse me while I interrupt myself"

"And the first five places are filled by five different cars."

"And Damon Hill is following Damon Hill."

"Michael Schumacher is leading Michael Schumacher."

"Jean Alesi is 4th and 5th."

"Villeneuve is now twelve seconds ahead of Villeneuve."

"Frentzen is taking, er, reducing that gap between himself and Frentzen."

"This has been a great season for Nelson Piquet, as he is now known, and always has been."

"It's lap 26 of 58, which unless I'm very much mistaken is half way."

"I'm ready to stop my start watch."

"Only a few more laps to go and then the action will begin. Unless this is the action, which it is!"

"I can't imagine what kind of problem Senna has. I imagine it must be some sort of grip problem."

"He's obviously gone in for a pit stop. I say obviously, because I cannot see anything."

"And the first three cars are all Escorts, which isn't surprising as this is an all Escort race."

"He is exactly 10 seconds ahead, or more approximately, 9.86 seconds."

"Look up there! That's the sky!"

"There's nothing wrong with his car except that it's on fire."

"I don't want to tempt fate but Damon Hill is now only half a lap from his first Grand Prix win and… and HE'S SLOWING DOWN, DAMON HILL IS SLOWING DOWN… HE'S... HE'S STOPPED!"

"As you look at the first four, the significant thing is that Alboreto is fifth."

"He's the only man on the track, except for his car."

"You might think that's not cricket, and it's not. It's motor racing."

"And Michael Schumacher is actually in a very good position. He is in last place."

"One light, two lights, three lights, four laps, five lights, go, go, go!"

"That's history. I say history because it happened in the past."

"There are a lot of IFs in Formula One, in fact IF is Formula One backwards!"

"Anything happens in Grand Prix racing, and it usually does."

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